oh like. the ridiculously, deliriously delicious beginning of possibly a new romance. the tingly sensation when you meet someone new that you fancy way to much. the pounding of your heart beat taking over while common sense decides to check out of your brain.
there is a method of coaching based on the science that we have 3 brain centres. head, heart and gut. when we start to fall into like, it’s safe to say that the heart brain decides to pull rank and take over from our logical thinking head brain and our do or don’t gut brain.
don’t get me wrong i love being in like. it’s so high school. the day dreaming, the fuzzy feeling, the doodling of their names into park benches (okay that might be a lil much to begin with). it’s just so nice to feel nice to like someone and have them feel the same.
the trouble seems to be with some of my clients that it can lead to not so great behaviours. being soooo in like can bring up questions if you start to forward think it too much. some clients researching wedding locations after a few dates. hello bunny boilers! over thinking and playing out scenarios of what can happen and what if it doesn’t happen can be a source of much anxiety and unnecessary stress.
taking pressure off the scenario will find you enjoying being “in like” more. being present in the moment and actually listening to the other person instead of nodding whilst you’re really thinking if it’s too soon to get monogrammed mr and mrs attire.
should you find yourself on the scary path of accidently liking an instagram pic of from 137 weeks ago you should really try to move where they are placed in your mind.
what the hell does that mean?
well we hold our thoughts, memories and behaviours in certain areas of our mind. majority of clients when asked to close their eyes and tell me where is the object of their affection, they turn up its usually right smack bang in front of them. i then ask to just move that person to a place in their mind where they can just keep them for a while so they can go back to concentrating on things like work, eating and driving on the right side of the road.
remembering your deal breakers instead of being that heart eyed emoji always helps too. when we are in the throws of like we over look things that in the long run is something that we don’t want to deal with. things like several children to different mothers/fathers, a complete difference on political views or perhaps they wear socks with sandals. what ever your deal breakers just because they are terribly good looking or an 11/10 in the bedroom these things will fall to the wayside.
most importantly, relax. it’s only a been a few dates. it may work and it may not. all you can do is be in charge of what you do. so be your best you.